Godlette's Extended FAQ

Here are some questions that I usually get asked once the person doing the asking has figured that I'm not out to hurt him or her. Sorry if I'm giving you too much info, but deal, okay? E-mail me if you'd like to know something not asked here.

What is your sexual orientation?
I am straight. Very straight. At one point, I was borderline bisexual (I had a crush on a woman), but I am completely positive I am over that now.

Are you a virgin?
Yes and no. Yes, in that I've never willingly had sex with a man. No, because I have had intercourse.

Were you raped or something?
I was a victim of childhood sexual abuse. I wasn't raped in the conventional sense of the word, but I was coerced.

What do you do with your spare time?
I spend 12 hours a week at a computer course, learning various applications and working towards a certification, and I spend about 15-20 hours a week online. The rest of the time I spend at home with my family.

Don't you have a social life?
In a word, no.

Why not?
Many reasons. #1, I grew up in an unorthodox household. I didn't go out, didn't socialize because I was very happy at home with my parents. #2, I was a strange person. I never fit in anywhere. In high school, I became a loner, and well, old habits die hard. #3, I am intimidated by situations I cannot control, and since that includes most social situations, I stay away from them.

Do you have a boyfriend?
No, but I'm working on it. Any takers?

Aren't you a bit strange?
Well, yes, but I like to think that it adds to my charm.

What religion are you?
I am a Disciples of Christ. In a word, I am a Christian. Disciples of Christ is one of the more liberal denominations.

So you believe in God
Yes. And I pray, too.

What about your family?
What about my family? I've been asking myself that for years.

No, who is in your family?
My mom, Kathy, aged 47, who is a diabetic amputee; my father, Ron, 52, who is a long haired biker freak; and my brother, who shall remain nameless, is a 25 year old child molester.

Wait, wait, wait. An amputee? A biker? A child molester? What kind of family are you from?
And you thought I was strange. I prefer to think that I was raised by a pack of wolves, but since I've already owned up to having an odd family, I should go ahead and explain them. My mother lost half her left leg due to diabetes in November of '96. My dad shaved his head in March of '92 in the midst of a mid-life crisis, turned biker and never looked back. He hasn't cut his hair since. And my brother is a child molester, and I was one of his victims.

Okay, enough heavy questions. How do you sleep?
With my eyes closed, just like everyone else.

Just one more thing: what are your goals for life?
By the time I'm 25, I'd either like to be back in college or married with a child. Beyond that, I don't want or expect much out of life.

Thank you.
Please drive through

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